An Interactive Adventure: Dungeon Master

[Dryunya]

==> Speak in rhymes for the next 24 hours.

[RussetDivinity]

Realize that you respect Gerald's opinion of you more than you care about your morality. Let's get the letter!

[Qara-Xuan Zenith]

==> Throw a tantrum.

[narrativedilettante]

1. Speak in rhymes for the next 24 hours.
2. Realize that you respect Gerald's opinion of you more than you care about your morality. Let's get the letter!
3. Throw a tantrum.

The Random Number Generator has chosen 3.

"IT'S NOT FAIR!" You cry, falling to the ground outside your old neighbor's cell. Gerald will never love you now! Even if you can recover the embarrassing letter, how could you expect him to look you in the eye after you allowed a man to go to his death merely for the crime of being annoying? "It's not it's not it's not it's not!" You pound your fists on the floor. It's a stone floor, so you hurt your fists quite badly.

"Hey!" The rap-loving guy calls out to you. "Dude. Let me out of here! I don't wanna die!"

You could let him out of the cell. You have the correct key. You pick up your key ring, slowly, feeling disconnected from the action. Are you really doing this? Are you really letting the worst person in the kingdom run free again? As you lift the key to the lock, you feel a tap on your shoulder and jump, dropping the keys to the ground. You've been caught by someone.

Who is it?

[JackAlsworth]

==> Gerald, from Accounting.

[Dryunya]

==> Your shoulder angel.

[RussetDivinity]

==> Gerald, from Accounting.

I second this.

[Qara-Xuan Zenith]

==> It's your rap-loving neighbour (how did he get there?).

[Guyshane]

==> Slenderman

[eli_gone_crazy]

==> Gerald, from Accounting.

I second this.

I third this.

[Victin]

==> Gerald, from Accounting.

I second this.

I third this.

Why not, I fourth this.

[Krika]

==> Slenderman

Seconding THIS.

[Sophira]

==> Superman.

[narrativedilettante]

Selecting...

[narrativedilettante]

1. Gerald, from Accounting.
2. Your shoulder angel.
3. Gerald, from Accounting.
4. It's your rap-loving neighbour (how did he get there?).
5. Slenderman
6. Gerald, from Accounting.
7. Gerald, from Accounting.
8. Slenderman
9. Superman.

The Random Number Generator has selected 1.

You are not prepared to face Gerald. The embarrassingly flowery prose from that letter is still floating around in your head, making you swoon when you look at him. You still haven't had a chance to wipe the remnants of pie off your face. And you know that if you get into an argument with a jerk from accounting, you'll run out of time to save your neighbor from his impending doom.

"G-Gerald, I-" You stammer, but Gerald silences you by holding a finger up to your lips.

"There's no need to explain," he says, holding up a sheet of paper with his other hand. Your letter! You snatch it from him, even though, by the way he's smiling, it seems clear he's already read it. Still, you put it behind your back so that it can't incriminate you even further. "I never realized," Gerald starts to say, and you brace yourself, hoping that he'll just say something like how foolish you are and not that you're a horrible person who deserves to be shot into the sun. "That you felt the same way," he concludes.

Wait.

Wait, what?

You stare at Gerald in disbelief. Did you just hear what you thought you heard?

"I've loved you from the moment you traipsed into my office in that Dungeon Master's uniform. I know every time we talked I came off as... as arrogant, and pedantic, and I'm sorry. I just never knew how to be myself when you were so... captivating. And intimidating. But I'm glad, that you finally had the courage to bridge this gap between us."

Oh, wow. This is really happening. Your long-assumed-unrequited love turns out to be quite requited indeed. This is an awful lot to take in.

How do you react?

[Victin]

==> Freak out then freak out more while asking his help to save your rap-loving neighbor.

[Qara-Xuan Zenith]

==>Break into song about this newfound mutual love

[Dryunya]

==> Level up.

[Guyshane]

==> Accidentally activate a pitfall trap dropping both you and Gerald into a hole filled with water

[narrativedilettante]

Selecting...

[narrativedilettante]

1. Freak out then freak out more while asking his help to save your rap-loving neighbor.
2. Break into song about this newfound mutual love
3. Level up.
4. Accidentally activate a pitfall trap dropping both you and Gerald into a hole filled with water

The Random Number Generator has chosen 4.

"I... I don't know what to say!" You exclaim, reeling with the revelation that Gerald cares just as much about you as you care about him. "In all my hopes, I never... I can't believe this is real, I-" You take a step back, and place your hand on the wall to steady yourself.

You really should have looked at where you were placing your hand.

One of the dungeon's many secret buttons depresses into the wall, and you and Gerald both plunge into the Shark Pit. The good news is that the Shark Pit is misnamed: While it is a pit, it contains no sharks, as keeping them fed would have taxed the dungeon's discretionary funds and they would have had difficulty surviving in the shallow water anyway.

The bad news is that if you don't find a way out of the Shark Pit in fifteen minutes, the trap will automatically reset and no one will have any idea that you're down there in need of rescuing. Sure, you'd get to live out the rest of your life with Gerald, but this really isn't how you ever dreamed of spending your time with him.

The water is shallow enough that you can stand with your head exposed, but Gerald has to tread water to keep breathing. When you hold your arm up, the lip of the pit doesn't seem that far out of reach; you're certain, if you could just jump high enough, that you could grab onto it. But you can't really jump well with all this water resisting your motion. Then, you get an idea.

"Hey, Gerald," you say, "Climb onto my shoulders."

"Oh, I... er, that is," Gerald sputters. "I didn't... I know my confession was a little forward, but I really don't think-"

"No, not like that," you say, though you don't know exactly what 'like that' means in this circumstance. What DID Gerald think you were suggesting? Probably something you should inquire about at a later date, when you know each other a little better. "I think if you're standing on my shoulders you may be able to climb out of here."

"Oh," says Gerald, sounding quite relieved. He uses your shoulders as a foothold and just barely manages to grasp the edge of the pit. With some pushing from you, he scrambles up over the ledge and back into the dungeon proper. "Now how do I get you out of there?" He asks, once he's safely out of harm's way.

You have maybe ten minutes left before the pit closes. There are some ropes and chains and other objects you might be able to use to climb out of the pit, if you can explain clearly to Gerald where they are. Of course, by the time you're out it's likely the executioner will have been and gone with your annoying prisoner, so you want to be as quick as possible.

What do you tell Gerald to do?

[RussetDivinity]

Grab a rope and save himself.

[Victin]

==> Activate the Shark Pit draining system

[Krika]

=>Tell him that you cannot escape - leave now and live a good life!

[Qara-Xuan Zenith]

==> Use his hitherto unmentioned telekinesis to levitate you out of the pit.