Steal the Apple!!

[Victin]

Ps I still have the apple.

As I said, I do'nt like apples. I can't give it to Mimsy, because he is it, and I can't give it to Sicon 'cuz he won't eat it.

... Just go get Dryu damn it.

*Carefully uncovers her ears, which are still ringing like nobody's buisness* Ow... yeah... that might be a good plan. Or at the very least a plan which doesn't do the same level of damage to my ear canals. Um, Dryuuuu!

Oh, sorry Miss. Well, Dryu isn't here, but he must have some keys around, musn't him?

*starts looking for keys*

[Scarab]

Oh, sorry Miss. Well, Dryu isn't here, but he must have some keys around, musn't him?

*starts looking for keys*

*Also starts looking around for keys... find secret trapdoor instead. Falls down.*

[Victin]

Oh, sorry Miss. Well, Dryu isn't here, but he must have some keys around, musn't him?

*starts looking for keys*

*Also starts looking around for keys... find secret trapdoor instead. Falls down.*

*watches secret trapdoor becames an air-sealed hatch and close itself*

*attempts to destroy it conjuring a spell that deals Divine damage*

*nothing happens*

Well, well, well, what do we have here?

*flyes close to three wells, and notices one of them shows Scarab*

Hey Scarab! Can you hear me?

[Qara-Xuan Zenith]

They're all in there, are they?

The adamantium begins to pulse as it ticks faster and faster.

Tick. Tick. Tick tick. Tick tick tick. Tick-tick-tick-tick-tick-tick-ti--

I watch dispassionately (how else do you expect an apple to watch?) as Dryu's underground vault explodes in a magnificent balloon of purplish-pink smoke and flying, flaming debris, presumably taking Her Highness, Her Bonsusness, and Victin with it.

The explosion sets everything within a 3-lightyear radius ablaze. I, too, am set ablaze.

I am reborn from my ashes 3.7652238959483745702785979018907510760187041 seconds later. I am the apple, and Mimsy is me. The apple is Mimsy.

[Victin]

*watches as Scarab and SoS are incinerated*

Thanks goodness I'm multidimension. Wait, even then I'm on fire.

*beat*

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!

*repeatedly pats burning limbs, which includes two of my eyes, one of my "hairs", three of my arms, seven of my legs and my fake 3-D body which I used to interact with Scarab*

*watches them turn into ashes*

Oh, well.

*watches ashes turn into apple-eating "cotton-candy" slimes with laser wings, acid tongues and ever-regenerating brains*



*slowly moonwalks away*

[The Wild West Pyro]

.................………

This was a thread about stealing an apple.

I'm not even gonna ask how it got so derailed.


Ps I still have the apple.

I'M TRYING TO SAY, I'M NOT PARTICIPATING, ONLY WATCHING YOU GUYS.

[Genndy Oda C.O.G.]

*Takes the apple* And it begins anew.

[AMimsyBorogove]

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?

...

*snags the apple with a fishing rod while flying overhead in a rocket-propelled blimp.*

...

Wait a minute... WHY DID I THINK THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?

*the rockets ignite the gas in the blimp, which in turn ignites every last bit of the rocket fuel. The Hindenburg pales in comparison to the massively destructive explosion that results as my ridiculously impractical vehicle violently combusts all at once.*

[RationalThought]

As the apple falls to the ground, I fly by, dressed as Superman, grabbing the apple.

Then I remember that I'm unable to fly.

[The Wild West Pyro]

As the apple falls to the ground, I fly by, dressed as Superman, grabbing the apple.

Then I remember that I'm unable to fly.

You may want a jet pack.

[RationalThought]

I attempt to grab a jetpack, but reality ensues. I burn my hindquarters badly while flying into the Sears Tower. The apple continues to fall, as I flail helplessly.

[The Wild West Pyro]

I attempt to grab a jetpack, but reality ensues. I burn my hindquarters badly while flying into the Sears Tower. The apple continues to fall, as I flail helplessly.

Pull your hoodie string. THERE'S A PARACHUTE. AND A SPARE ONE.

[AMimsyBorogove]

Don't listen to him. The "parachutes" are actually just pianos.

[Victin]

Don't listen to him. The "pianos" are actually just leopards.

[Genndy Oda C.O.G.]

Don't listen to either of them. You've already landed.

[AMimsyBorogove]

On the moon, that is.

[Victin]

Pluto's moon, that is.

[RationalThought]

Good thing Batman can breathe in space!

Wait, I'm not Batman.

[The Wild West Pyro]

Good thing Batman can breathe in space!

Wait, I'm not Batman.

REBREATHER!

[AMimsyBorogove]

Except it's actually just a pretzel.

[RationalThought]

I die. Then respawn.

[Genndy Oda C.O.G.]

I walk past, and replace the Apple with a game of Apples to Apples.