The Coffee Room

[AMimsyBorogove]

Lots of knives, huh...?

Hey, Pixel, here! Take this stopwatch with the power to halt the flow of time, white wig, steamroller, and maid outfit, and enjoy your new theme song.

=P

[JackAlsworth]

Beds are nice. Beds don't try to hurt innocent bystanders who only wanted a freaking drink.

But I'm not sleeping. Oh no. Waaaay too cranked for sleep. Close your eyes for even a second, and they come out and get you.

[Sicon112]

Hey! I was totally innocent! You can't prove anything!

*stares*

*Also stares*
No seriously, what were the odds of us actually believing that?

A completely unrelated question:

What are the odds of you surviving if you don't believe it?

[Scarab]

A completely unrelated question:

What are the odds of you surviving if you don't believe it?

*Draws Ice Wand* I'd say about fifty fifty, wanna start taking bets now?

[Pixelmage]

Lots of knives, huh...?

Hey, Pixel, here! Take this stopwatch with the power to halt the flow of time, white wig, steamroller, and maid outfit, and enjoy your new theme song.

=P

*Stops peeling potatOS*
I started without asking if we have a computer in here... I can't create an insane AI out of potato batteries without a computer...
*looks at stopwatch*

*knives flying all around the room!*

[Sicon112]

A completely unrelated question:

What are the odds of you surviving if you don't believe it?

*Draws Ice Wand* I'd say about fifty fifty, wanna start taking bets now?

OK, but only if you factor into the odds the orbital laser bombardment that just fired on your location, which is about to heat the area around you to a few thousand degrees kelvin with the help of my flames, turning your ice into GAS. That, plus the seventeen hundred strong army of undead that is about to bust down the wall to your left, the electrocution trap in the floor right where you are standing, the fact that I'm not even here right now, and the fact that the pool-fish-monster is loose, hungry, and RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

[Victin]

A completely unrelated question:

What are the odds of you surviving if you don't believe it?

*Draws Ice Wand* I'd say about fifty fifty, wanna start taking bets now?

OK, but only if you factor into the odds the orbital laser bombardment that just fired on your location, which is about to heat the area around you to a few thousand degrees kelvin with the help of my flames, turning your ice into GAS. That, plus the seventeen hundred strong army of undead that is about to bust down the wall to your left, the electrocution trap in the floor right where you are standing, the fact that I'm not even here right now, and the fact that the pool-fish-monster is loose, hungry, and RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

*survives*

[The Finch]

(Shakes Bed in excitement)

[Victin]

(Shakes Bed in excitement)

"I shot a rocket at you!"

[Sicon112]

*survives*

It was going for Scarab. You just have to worry about the collateral damage.

Seriously though Scarab, rule number one of being me: Always stack the odds.

[JackAlsworth]

OK, but only if you factor into the odds the orbital laser bombardment that just fired on your location, which is about to heat the area around you to a few thousand degrees kelvin with the help of my flames, turning your ice into GAS. That, plus the seventeen hundred strong army of undead that is about to bust down the wall to your left, the electrocution trap in the floor right where you are standing, the fact that I'm not even here right now, and the fact that the pool-fish-monster is loose, hungry, and RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

Killed if I stay. Killed if I leave. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. Damned if I do, damned if I don't damnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidont

[Sicon112]

OK, but only if you factor into the odds the orbital laser bombardment that just fired on your location, which is about to heat the area around you to a few thousand degrees kelvin with the help of my flames, turning your ice into GAS. That, plus the seventeen hundred strong army of undead that is about to bust down the wall to your left, the electrocution trap in the floor right where you are standing, the fact that I'm not even here right now, and the fact that the pool-fish-monster is loose, hungry, and RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

Killed if I stay. Killed if I leave. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. Damned if I do, damned if I don't damnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidont

Too slow. *BOOOOOOOOOOOM*

[JackAlsworth]

Killed if I stay. Killed if I leave. Damned if I do, damned if I don't. Damned if I do, damned if I don't damnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidont

Too slow. *BOOOOOOOOOOOM*

damnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidont
*vanishes*

[Pixelmage]

A completely unrelated question:

What are the odds of you surviving if you don't believe it?

*Draws Ice Wand* I'd say about fifty fifty, wanna start taking bets now?

OK, but only if you factor into the odds the orbital laser bombardment that just fired on your location, which is about to heat the area around you to a few thousand degrees kelvin with the help of my flames, turning your ice into GAS. That, plus the seventeen hundred strong army of undead that is about to bust down the wall to your left, the electrocution trap in the floor right where you are standing, the fact that I'm not even here right now, and the fact that the pool-fish-monster is loose, hungry, and RIGHT BEHIND YOU.

*stab*
*and also stab at the other four clones*
*time stop and perfect grazing score*
*waiting for the decoy army to appear*

[Sicon112]

damnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidont
*vanishes*

Look at it this way, Jack. At least there is a reset button in here.

*stab*
*and also stab at the other four clones*
*time stop and perfect grazing score*
*waiting for the decoy army to appear*

Meh, I'm not here to fight Touhou characters. Go after my brother. He stole all of your ink...

[Scarab]

It was going for Scarab. You just have to worry about the collateral damage.

Seriously though Scarab, rule number one of being me: Always stack the odds.

I was gonna say... you ever heard of overkill?

Anyway, like I said, fifty fifty. *Pets the pool fish monster on the nose* But we made up about the whole almost killing him... her... erm, it with a freezing cold ray. Besides I created the pool, I'm pretty much the reason he exists, this ice wand appears to have had some kind of green-stuff infused transformation that allows me to walk THROUGH things that would normally turn it to steam (ow, provided I'm willing to sacrifice the feeling in my figners for a while), aaand until the orbital bombardment gets here I have... *checks watch* approximately five seconds to get out of this pedicament. Four, now.

*Freezes the trap,picks up the fragments of crystalsied frozen lightning (no, seriously, it's THAT cold) and pops them in her pocket, steps over the remains of the trap, and goes to freeze the doorways before the armies of the undead break in*.

HEY GUYS, Sicon unleashed the hoardes of the dead on us AGAIN. Can we get some kind of rule established about that? *Throws up ice shield and waits for the bombardment to end*

[Sicon112]

I was gonna say... you ever heard of overkill?

Anyway, like I said, fifty fifty. *Pets the pool fish monster on the nose* But we made up about the whole almost killing him... her... erm, it with a freezing cold ray. Besides I created the pool, I'm pretty much the reason he exists, this ice wand appears to have had some kind of green-stuff infused transformation that allows me to walk THROUGH things that would normally turn it to steam (ow, provided I'm willing to sacrifice the feeling in my figners for a while), aaand until the orbital bombardment gets here I have... *checks watch* approximately five seconds to get out of this pedicament. Four, now.

*Freezes the trap,picks up the frahments of crystalsied frozen lightning and pops them in her pocket, steps over the remains of the trap, and goes to freeze the doorways before the armies of the undead break in*.

HEY GUYS, Sicon unleashed the hoardes of the dead on us AGAIN. Can we get some kind of rule established about that? *Throws up ice shield and waits for the bombardment to end*

Oh come on, the bombardment was an illusion, and the trap was a fake. Would I really tell you where my attack was coming from?

*The arms of a thousand unspeakable horrors from the beyond tear open space time in the floor below Scarab and she is pulled into the rift*

[JackAlsworth]

*reappears approximately two feet away from the carnage*

ifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidothe hell?

[Sicon112]

*reappears approximately two feet away from the carnage*

ifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidothe hell?

Oops, that's a land mine! *BOOOOM*

*reset*

*POP*

[Pixelmage]

*reappears approximately two feet away from the carnage*

ifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidothe hell?

*stab*

[JackAlsworth]

*reappears approximately two feet away from the carnage*

ifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidothe hell?

Oops, that's a land mine! *BOOOOM*

*reset*

*POP*

the land mine was a

DISTACTION

(Okay, no. No Homestuck references. I refuse to use a Homestuck reference to retroactively save myself -) *vanishes again*

*reappears approximately two feet away from the carnage*

ifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidothe hell?

*stab*

*reappears into Pixel's knife*

Dammit... not... again... *slumps to the ground*

[Sicon112]

*reappears approximately two feet away from the carnage*

ifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidodamnedifidontdamnedifidothe hell?

*stab*

Pixie! That's spawn camping! Bad Pixie!

[Scarab]

Oh come on, the bombardment was an illusion, and the trap was a fake. Would I really tell you where my attack was coming from?

*The arms of a thousand unspeakable horrors from the beyond tear open space time in the floor below Scarab and she is pulled into the rift*

*Climbs irritably out of the Rift in the Coffee room and freezes it up behind her. Alas, she is outwitted again*

Seriously? I think you're abusing the lack of physical reality in here, Sicon. There's being able to Xanatos Gabmit and outwit people really, really well... and then there's just bluffing and making it up as you go. Get back to me when you want a real fight.

The fake!bombarbment was pretty, though. Kudos on the pretty

*Is grabbed at by unspeakable terrors breaking through the ice* Eww gross, Isla REALLY needs to talk to her Inlaws.

Pixie! That's spawn camping! Bad Pixie!

Agreed, dude, spawn camping is NOT on.

[Pixelmage]

*reappears into Pixel's knife*

Dammit... not... again... *slumps to the ground*

Oh, don't worry... You won't die from a simple stab wound. I'll make sure you don't die.

[IslaKariese]

*reappears into Pixel's knife*

Dammit... not... again... *slumps to the ground*

Oh, don't worry... You won't die from a simple stab wound. I'll make sure you don't die.

It's no fun when you die.