The Coffee Room

[NeverSlender]

Now playing at the Coffee Room Cinema: Neverlender Fixes Time.

Tickets: FREE!

CONCESSIONS: FREE!

*Hits time with a hammer*

.ti dexif I kniht I

[The Finch]

Now playing at the Coffee Room Cinema: Neverlender Fixes Time.

Tickets: FREE!

CONCESSIONS: FREE!

*Hits time with a hammer*

.ti dexif I kniht I

YOU FOOL, THAT'S NOT HOW IT WOOEHJRTIA

[NeverSlender]

You do realize you jerks are burning too, right?

I'm intangible so I'm unaffected.

[Sicon112]

You're still destabilizing, though.

No, I'm really not. My flames are my own existence. They remain unaffected by particle emissions such as radiation. In fact, they are sort of similar to gamma radiation in that they are high concentrations of pure energy, except that they come from a dimension incomprehensible to humans, so...

[Endless Sea]

Now playing at the Coffee Room Cinema: Neverlender Fixes Time.

Tickets: FREE!

CONCESSIONS: FREE!

*Hits time with a hammer*

.ti dexif I kniht I

Looks like I might need to call Lehu. First of all, though... *fires off another plasma ball*

...Hey, wait, I'm speaking normally. Looks like I did get Lehu... IN THE FUTURE

[Endless Sea]

You're still destabilizing, though.

No, I'm really not. My flames are my own existence. They remain unaffected by particle emissions such as radiation. In fact, they are sort of similar to gamma radiation in that they are high concentrations of pure energy, except that they come from a dimension incomprehensible to humans, so...

Particles? When did I mention particles? And for that matter, are you really so ignorant that you still believe I'm human?

[JackAlsworth]

You do realize you jerks are burning too, right?

Oh, now, we can't have that.

*shields the audience with a plasma-proof barrier*

Look, I know you're upset, and these guys can be a pain in the ass sometimes, but killing with fire really isn't the answer here.

[Pixelmage]

Looks like I might need to call Lehu. First of all, though... *fires off another plasma ball*

...Hey, wait, I'm speaking normally. Looks like I did get Lehu... IN THE FUTURE

Don't know what shit is going on here... But you know what..?
*stab*
*summon daggers*
*more stabbing*

And now I can relax to sleep soundly!
*vanishes again*

[eli_gone_crazy]

okay, I'm going to read this now....

78 pages?! O.o

*slowly edges to the door*

[Endless Sea]

You do realize you jerks are burning too, right?

Oh, now, we can't have that.

*shields the audience with a plasma-proof barrier*

Look, I know you're upset, and these guys can be a pain in the ass sometimes, but killing with fire really isn't the answer here.

Fire? This is plasma, fool. And not just regular plasma, either, but Plasma Form-brand elemental plasma, guaranteed to do whatever the hell Mister Author requires of it to be the most absolutely lethal substance in the history of ever.

[The Finch]

MEANWHILE, AT THE BROKEN AREA THAT MOST KNOW AS TIME...

[Pixelmage]

okay, I'm going to read this now....

78 pages?! O.o

*slowly edges to the door*

There is no door.
And don't bother reading the previous pages, it won't help make sense of what happens here.
Just, enjoy your stay. Forever.

[IslaKariese]

*Yawns and flips another page in her book*

[Sicon112]

You're still destabilizing, though.

No, I'm really not. My flames are my own existence. They remain unaffected by particle emissions such as radiation. In fact, they are sort of similar to gamma radiation in that they are high concentrations of pure energy, except that they come from a dimension incomprehensible to humans, so...

Particles? When did I mention particles? And for that matter, are you really so ignorant that you still believe I'm human?

Radiation comes in three forms: Alpha, Beta, and Gamma. Alpha and Beta radiation are dangerous because they release extremely high-energy particles. This means they travel very fast and when they come into contact with your cells, they transfer the large kinetic energy over and destroy the cell, most times. Gamma radiation occurs when a molecule finds itself in an extremely high-energy state, but releasing parts of itself as particles would destabilize it. Then it just releases a Gamma ray, an extremely high energy light particle, to release the energy. Gamma radiation happens to be the most powerful form, just so you know. Regardless, none of these forms would affect me.

Yay nuclear physics class.

[The Finch]

okay, I'm going to read this now....

78 pages?! O.o

*slowly edges to the door*

Yeah, you might want to get dinner first.

[JackAlsworth]

okay, I'm going to read this now....

78 pages?! O.o

*slowly edges to the door*

Yeah, don't bother. Just jump in. The backstory isn't really required anyway. The basic rules are:
[list=][*]No outside food or drink.[*]No bumping.[*]Don't piss off the kraken.[/list]

After that, pretty much sky's the limit. Here, pull up a chair.

MEANWHILE, AT THE BROKEN AREA THAT MOST KNOW AS TIME...

Right, right, someone should get on that...

*looks around*

...Of course it's going to be me, isn't it?

[NeverSlender]

MEANWHILE, AT THE BROKEN AREA THAT MOST KNOW AS TIME...

Meh, it'll be fine. I don't think time has much say here.

[eli_gone_crazy]

okay, I'm going to read this now....

78 pages?! O.o

*slowly edges to the door*

There is no door.
And don't bother reading the previous pages, it won't help make sense of what happens here.
Just, enjoy your stay. Forever.

EPIC TWIST. :O
yeah, once I browsed through the first page i figured as much...

[The Finch]

DUN DUN

[Scarab]

DUN DUN

DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN.

[eli_gone_crazy]

okay, I'm going to read this now....

78 pages?! O.o

*slowly edges to the door*

Yeah, don't bother. Just jump in. The backstory isn't really required anyway. The basic rules are:
[list=][*]No outside food or drink.[*]No bumping.[*]Don't piss off the kraken.[/list]

After that, pretty much sky's the limit. Here, pull up a chair.

hey, thanks!
I think time avoids this place. I mean, we have coffee. and a Kraken apparently.

[Victin]

The entire idea of time has failed.

WAT DO

Watch.

RUN={WATCH_COFFEEROOM}

*FAILED TO RUN={WATCH_COFFEROOM}*

*SYSTEM OVERPOWERED*

*REBOOTING SYSTEM*

*SYSTEM SUCCESSFULLY REBOOTED*

RUN={WATCH/OPTIONS_COFFEROOM}

OPTION=[RUN={LOGIC_COFFEROOM}]

RUN=LOGIC_COFFEROOM

*FAILED TO RUN={LOGIC_COFFEROOM}*

OPTION=[RUN={LOGIC/COFFEEROOM}]

RUN=LOGIC/COFFEEROOM

EɹR@ɹ=ɹ3b00t/u0£0nG3ɹ4b£3t0ɹunD4t4s%&ql3h#01101000011001010110110001110000

[NeverSlender]

okay, I'm going to read this now....

78 pages?! O.o

*slowly edges to the door*

Yeah, don't bother. Just jump in. The backstory isn't really required anyway. The basic rules are:
[list=][*]No outside food or drink.[*]No bumping.[*]Don't piss off the kraken.[/list]

After that, pretty much sky's the limit. Here, pull up a chair.

hey, thanks!
I think time avoids this place. I mean, we have coffee. and a Kraken apparently.

Cthulhu has also made himself at home in the pillow fort with his bride.

[eli_gone_crazy]

The entire idea of time has failed.

WAT DO

Watch.

RUN={WATCH_COFFEEROOM}
*FAILED TO RUN={WATCH_COFFEROOM}*
*SYSTEM OVERPOWERED*
*REBOOTING SYSTEM*
*SYSTEM SUCCESSFULLY REBOOTED*
RUN={WATCH/OPTIONS_COFFEROOM}
OPTION=[RUN={LOGIC_COFFEROOM}]
RUN=LOGIC_COFFEROOM
*FAILED TO RUN={LOGIC_COFFEROOM}*
OPTION=[RUN={LOGIC/COFFEEROOM}]
RUN=LOGIC/COFFEEROOM
EɹR@ɹ=ɹ3b00t/u0£0nG3ɹ4b£3t0ɹunD4t4s%&ql3h#01101000011001010110110001110000

YOU MURDERER!!!

[Sicon112]

okay, I'm going to read this now....

78 pages?! O.o

*slowly edges to the door*

Yeah, don't bother. Just jump in. The backstory isn't really required anyway. The basic rules are:
[list=][*]No outside food or drink.[*]No bumping.[*]Don't piss off the kraken.[/list]

After that, pretty much sky's the limit. Here, pull up a chair.

hey, thanks!
I think time avoids this place. I mean, we have coffee. and a Kraken apparently.

Well, for a certain definition of the word "coffee". We used to have normal coffee, but by page two, the only food or drink that remained was stuff from eldritch dimensions and strange concoctions that drive people mad at a glance. Have fun!