Dave went to get milk

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Dave went to get milk

Postby Lordxana0 on Tue May 06, 2014 1:34 pm

Welcome to the new forum game. Here is how it works. Dave has left his house to go get milk, he is a normal guy who just needs to get milk for his cereal, but many obstacles lie in wait to prevent him from this quest. Every post someone will fix the problem put before him in whatever way they see fit, and post a new problem preventing Dave from getting the milk. The obstacle and solution can be ridiculous as possible so long as
1) Dave doesn't die
2) Dave doesn't get super powers
3) You don't just end the game.

Lets begin shall we?

Dave heads out of his house to get the milk but realizes he doesn't have his wallet on him.
Who you going to call? ME!
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby narrativedilettante on Tue May 06, 2014 2:10 pm

Dave finds a $10 bill in his pocket, which should cover the cost of milk.

He keeps going, but ahead, the road is closed for construction.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can put off until the day after.
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby Dryunya on Tue May 06, 2014 2:31 pm

Dave takes a detour.

Suddenly, the $10 bill falls out of his pocket and gets blown away by a gust of wind.
I have attempted to suppress my inner hyperspace future gardener crying out against all the injustice I am committing.
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby Qara-Xuan Zenith on Tue May 06, 2014 2:46 pm

A mysterious stranger slips twelve dollars in change into Dave's hand, winks, and vanishes.

Dave keeps heading to the store when suddenly a hole opens up in the sidewalk and he falls in, landing deep underground.
Lead by example. Get lost in a swamp.

AS DICTATED TO INSTANTIATION 17-01-18-01.
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby Dryunya on Tue May 06, 2014 2:52 pm

Dave calls 911. There's no reception, so he just screams at the top of his lungs. He gets rescued in 2 days, and is taken to a hospital with minor bruises and dehydration.

By the time he comes out of the hospital, it's almost nighttime, and all the stores are closed. He still needs that milk, though.
(Ну ничего себе сходил за хлебушком...)
I have attempted to suppress my inner hyperspace future gardener crying out against all the injustice I am committing.
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby The Wild West Pyro on Tue May 06, 2014 7:53 pm

Dryunya wrote:Dave calls 911. There's no reception, so he just screams at the top of his lungs. He gets rescued in 2 days, and is taken to a hospital with minor bruises and dehydration.

By the time he comes out of the hospital, it's almost nighttime, and all the stores are closed. He still needs that milk, though.
(Ну ничего себе сходил за хлебушком...)


When he gets to the store, he finds that the entire store is frozen over completely, and there's a pretty woman in a fancy dress manipulating it.
FIRE!
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby Genndy Oda C.O.G. on Thu May 08, 2014 9:02 pm

Dave manages to woo the fancy woman, persuading her to try to return the store to normal.

Unfortunately, though the store is thawed, the milk section is still close to absolute zero.
Apparently, slightly less weird than most of you.
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby eli_gone_crazy on Thu May 08, 2014 11:39 pm

Dave gets a blowtorch to thaw the milk section.

But then he realizes he has no fuel.
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby IslaKariese on Fri May 09, 2014 12:51 am

Dave goes to the other end of the line of stores and buys fuel for the blowtorch. But instead of just thawing the milk, he makes the whole section evaporate completely. Those things are hot.
The voices in my head tell me that we saved the world. However, they also told me that George Clooney's face is on the dollar bill, so... meh. The voices are more fun, anyway.
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby Dryunya on Fri May 09, 2014 6:27 am

Luckily, the store down the street was open. Dave buys the milk and heads home.

Then Dave wakes up.
I have attempted to suppress my inner hyperspace future gardener crying out against all the injustice I am committing.
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby eli_gone_crazy on Fri May 09, 2014 9:05 am

The milk has grown legs, arms, and apparently sentience. The little jug has trashed Dave's kitchen and run off, if the broken window is anything to go by.

Dave grabs a pillow and heads off to search for his milk.
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby IslaKariese on Fri May 09, 2014 4:46 pm

Dave's plan to apparently smother the milk into submission is stopped by the police. Apparently walking around in your pajamas carrying a pillow with an angry look on your face makes the neighbors suspicious and paranoid. Go figure.
The voices in my head tell me that we saved the world. However, they also told me that George Clooney's face is on the dollar bill, so... meh. The voices are more fun, anyway.
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby Victin on Fri May 09, 2014 5:44 pm

Dave explains his side of the story and the cops let him go, but the milk is both taken under arrest and as evidence, as they couldn't figure out which category the milk jug belonged in.
Dolphins are some of the smartest animals, yes, but by human standards… Let's say you should praise the god that forces them to stay handless and underwater.
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby IslaKariese on Fri May 09, 2014 9:41 pm

Feeling rather miffed at this point, Dave calls his cat-burglar sister to help him break the milk out of jail. However, she doesn't like him having a tab on favors, and he still owes her from the last time this happened. He needs to pay up in some way before she does anything for him.
The voices in my head tell me that we saved the world. However, they also told me that George Clooney's face is on the dollar bill, so... meh. The voices are more fun, anyway.
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Re: Dave went to get milk

Postby The Wild West Pyro on Sat May 10, 2014 9:27 am

IslaKariese wrote:Feeling rather miffed at this point, Dave calls his cat-burglar sister to help him break the milk out of jail. However, she doesn't like him having a tab on favors, and he still owes her from the last time this happened. He needs to pay up in some way before she does anything for him.


He uses some money he found on the street to buy a pistol and silencer for her. She accepts and breaks the milk out of jail.

Just as Dave heads home, he spots two deliverymen, one fat, one thin, both wearing bowler hats, struggling to get a piano up a very long flight of stairs.
FIRE!
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